Thursday, June 3, 2010

When Intestines Attack

In episode 18 of Canadian TV series Grossology, insane proctologist Dr Cornelius Colon attempts to take over the world by "growing a giant colon that lives OUTSIDE THE BODY."

His campaign begins at Ringworm High School, where students trapped inside observe mucus sliding down the walls, a rotten stench, and large tapeworms in the corridors. The school is basically turning into a giant intestine. Incidentally, this reminds me of the moments in Silent Hill when the normal game world transforms into the freaky "Otherworld" full of mutants. Eg:



Back to Grossology: my favourite part is when Dr Colon gleefully describes his whole plan like an 007 villain: "my colon begins here, but as it feeds and grows it will spread out ensnaring everything in its path. Soon everyone will respect a healthy colon, because everyone will be inside one!!" As he speaks, the audience is shown fantasy images of an enormous fleshy tunnel moving through a city full of screaming citizens. A frontal shot, accompanied by the sounds of squelching and farting, depicts what amounts to a large throbbing ass bearing down on the cityscape.

And this is a kid's show, people.

You can watch if you don't believe me.









A little note on language: on this blog I've been referring to 'gross' as a modern slang form of the word grotesque. This involves a bit of fancy footwork, linguistically speaking, and I'm aware that 'gross' and 'grotesque' are not, in fact, synonymous historically.

Etymologically, the words have different roots. Gross comes from the Italian grosso, meaning large, while grotesque comes from grotto, meaning cave. 'Grotty' is the accepted (read: dictionary) slang for grotesque... However, I would argue that contemporary usage of the word gross has evolved to the point where there is a distinct relationship with ideas of the grotesque.

That's my story, anyway.

Respect a healthy colon.

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